I’ve been thinking that I should collect the writings of my Facebook page somewhere…Here seems like a good place. Enjoy these snipets of guidance!
Living an authentic and awake life doesn’t mean you don’t have bad days or bad moments. On the contrary, you may have more of them because you don’t waste energy resisting what you’re feeling. The difference is that you don’t make them into more than what they are. You see them, let them be without judging, and start fresh the next day or the next moment.
Doing something because someone says you should is self-betrayal, period. How does the idea of doing whatever it is make you FEEL? If it feels good, then do it. If it feels like a burden, then you’re not being true to yourself.
Momentum is key in creating change and building a fulfilling life, yes, but once in a while it’s ok to stop, get off the bicycle and take a few breaths. In fact, it is necessary. This refueling allows you to get up and back on the bicycle of life.
Do you have an idea brewing? Take one small step today.Make one call, have one conversation, read one thing, write down one action step you can take tomorrow.
Failure to take action always boils down to these 2 fears:
1) The fear of not being enough and
2) The fear that we won’t be loved. Peel back the layers and you’ll see and feel these fears.
You already ARE enough, and you are always loved.
These are truths that transcend human experience. So go on, take action!
Dealing with emotions you’re not enjoying? Ask yourself: 1) What am I feeling?
2) Where is this feeling coming from?
3) Is this feeling based on love or fear?
4) Does this feeling match the vision I have of my best self and best life? If this feeling is not serving you, ie. it’s not helping you get to where you want to go, drop it: Stop saying, thinking and doing what you have been saying, thinking and doing.
True independence is the freedom to be yourself. Do you edit what you say and hold back in what you do? Time to free yourself now.
It is normal to feel helpless in the face of horrible things like terrorist attacks, violence of any kind, famine, natural disasters or any number of occurrences we hear about daily.What can we do? Pray? Send relief money? Donate blood? Yes, of course! But don’t forget to do the one thing that can make the biggest impact: Mend your broken spirit. People who commit inconceivable acts have broken spirits. How’s your spirit doing? If you’re whole, you will affect those around you, and just like the butterfly effect, the world and the Earth itself will be uplifted and healed.
“We are unlimited in what we can give if we are not busy suffering.” I can remember the time, years ago, when I decided I didn’t want to suffer anymore. Anything (or anyone) that would cause me to suffer would just have to go. Truly liberating. If you are going to be “anti” anything, be anti-suffering.
If you’re in an intimate relationship, is it going well? Do you believe that you have to “work at it” to keep it going? Healthy and fulfilling relationships aren’t automatically created, with some exceptions of course. Most require some skill, just like anything worthwhile. Having said that, being in a relationship shouldn’t be a matter of constant struggle.
Here are the basic 4 relationship skills they don’t teach you in school:
1) Heartfelt understanding
2) Giving your partner what they really need
3) Creating and building trust and respect
4) Reigniting playfulness, presence and passion
How do you rate yourself and your partner on each of these? Remember, you are on the same team!
Ask yourself 3 questions that have the potential to shape your life:
1) WHAT AM I GOING TO FOCUS ON?
What do you want your mind to be attentive to? Thoughts affect how you feel, and you want to feel good, right?
2) WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?
What meaning can you assign to the situation you find yourself in? Is it an end or can it be a beginning? Are you being punished or nudged along?
3) WHAT AM I GOING TO DO?
Change only happens once you begin taking action. Do you give up or move forward? It’s up to you.
After answering these questions and having an idea of where you are and where you want to be, go ahead and CELEBRATE. Get up and dance, make some noise, treat yourself to something nice… Because most people go through an entire lifetime never asking themselves these or any questions.
Too much to do? Feeling overwhelmed and don’t know where to start? Or feeling lost and aimless, not sure where you’re headed in your career, in your life?
Ask this one question:
WHAT MATTERS TO ME?
What REALLY and TRULY matters to you? Your health? Spending time with your family? Having some peace and quiet? Creating something, or expressing yourself in some way? Learning and growing?
Once you have the answer(s), make time for THAT. Focus on THAT. And everything else will fall into place around THAT.
What is your model of the world? Your model of the world is your internal program that guides you in terms of what you expect from others, yourself, and the world. It’s about how you think you should live your life, what it is that you need and what you value. Once you understand your model of the world, you get closer to knowing who you are and who you can become.
Did you know there are 3 levels of love in any relationship?
1-Selfish Love: “My needs come first”.
2-Conditional Love: “You get yours. I get mine”.
3-Unconditional Love: “Your needs are as important as mine” and “I love you anyway”.
The last level is the foundation for trust. Where are you at in your most important relationships?
EMOTION: You’re feeling stuff you don’t want to feel, or you’re stuck in a pattern of anxiety/fear/anger/guilt etc. Ask:
1-What am I feeling? Name it and observe. this will dis-identify you from the emotion.
2-Where is this feeling coming from? Look at what you were thinking about before the feeling came on, Thoughts precede feelings.
3-Is this feeling based on love or fear? Bottom line is all feeling arises from a place of either love or fear. If it’s from fear, know that it is not real (F-alse E-xpectation A-ppearing R-eal).
4-Does it match the vision I have for myself and my life? If the feeling is not in alignment with who you want to be, where you want to go and what you want to do, it’s time to let it pass.
Stop saying, thinking and doing what led to the feeling in the first place. Shift your focus. You’re in charge, not the emotion.
Sounds simple but it’s not at first. Takes practice.
All emotion is normal and healthy, as long as it does not become your permanent state of being.
Love and compassion are the antidote to anxiety. Love yourself during your most anxious moments and watch the pain and fear melt away.
You may have wonderful goals, dreams and aspirations…But if you don’t have the physical ENERGY and the clarity of mind to take consistent action toward them, they will go unmet.
Here are a few energy-drainers:
Bad eating habits
Lack of fresh air
Lack of physical movement
Energy vampires (people who drain your energy)
And on and on…
Take charge of your energy now. It’s yours to manage, protect and direct.
Couples in trouble:
Sit down and have an “Executive Meeting” together.
Why is it ok to have meetings for work and not for our primary relationship?
– Block off a couple of hours where you know you will be uninterrupted and sit down over coffee or wine.
– Establish some ground rules: No attacking, no blaming, no yelling, etc. Stay calm and open to honest discussion.
– Listen. Take turns speaking (set a timer if you must) and promise to be silent while the other talks. Listen without thinking of what you want to say next. Just LISTEN.
– Discover the underlying intent behind behaviours or actions you don’t like. Has he/she really been deliberately trying to hurt you? Could you have been perceiving a situation from a distorted frame of mind because of how you think things should be?
– End with a plan for another meeting. Write it in the calendar, like you would a work meeting. This will avoid the pile-up of issues which, if left alone will cause resentment and bitterness.
Remember, YOU ARE ON THE SAME TEAM. Stop being opponents for a minute and get back on board. Together.
Maybe things can be resolved, maybe not…But at least you will have tried, with an open heart and mind. After all, something drew you to this person once upon a time…
What affects your EMOTIONS and the MEANINGS you associate to things and events?
1- PHYSIOLOGY: How you use your body (breath, posture, movement). Emotion is motion.
2- FOCUS: Whatever you focus on, you will feel.
3- LANGUAGE: As soon as we put words to an experience, the meaning we experience changes.